James 1:19 Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger;
If only we all put this into practice every day! It is amazing how much easier it is for most people to practice this in public than it is with their family members. When situations arise where there could be “words” with another family member it is important to hold your tongue, listen and then respond allowing God to guide our words and actions. Of course that is easier said than done with certain people at times but that is the key; allow the Holy Spirit to guide you in all that you do and the fruits of the Spirit will be present in your attitudes and behaviors.
Galatians 5:22 says, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.”
For some reason we seem to feel more justified if we can “speak our minds” when someone else is attacking us or we know that what they are saying is either full of lies or manipulative but trust me victory in the situation often comes in holding your tongue. Proverbs 29:11 says, “A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back.” If you are in a situation and you just want to “throw it all out there” stop for a minute, if need be, remove yourself for a few minutes to give yourself time to regroup so you can speak with godly wisdom.
Now, something we also need to remember ladies is that this applies to dealing with children as well. I have seen a lot of parents lately that have a tendency to allow situations with their children to become screaming matches. As soon as you start screaming along with your children Mom, you have just lost. A child knows that when they have pushed you to the point of being out of control they are ruling the situation. I came to the conclusion when my children were little that I wasn’t going to allow their behavior to get to a point where it was ruining my day. It took being consistent with taking the time to follow through with discipline every time there was wrong behavior so the situation couldn’t get to a point of someone exploding. Children learn what they live so it is important for them to see self-control modeled in front of them all the time, whether it is between the adults in their lives or between them and their parents.
I know that as long as we live we will need to practice being quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger. It is a life long process for most of us but learning to bite your tongue can be rewarding in the long run because we won’t have words that we wish we could take back and therefore we will have less hurt feelings in our close relationships. I would encourage you today to pray and ask God to give you the will to allow Him to control your words, attitudes and behaviors. Remember this; “How much more grievous are the consequences of uncontrolled anger than the causes of it.” Marcus Aurelius. Words cannot be taken back after they are spoken.
Quote: “Graciousness is more than good manners. It is more than courtesy. It is the etiquette of the soul. True graciousness has such a divine quality we feel it is something that comes through us and not from us.” Fred Smith