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Why do you pass judgment on your brother? Or you, why do you despise your brother? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God; for it is written, “As I live, says the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God.” So then each of us will give an account of himself to God.
If you are going to judge someone because of their past, you may want to keep a few things in mind:
First of all is this thing you have made yourself “judge” over real from his/her past, or are you guilty of running headlong with someone’s gossip about them? Gossip destroys and there is no good end when it spreads. You don’t want to get caught up in gossip and destroy your own testimony. Gossip tends to be like a snowball rolling down hill, it just keeps getting more and more added to it until there may not be any truth to it at all. Proverbs 16:28 says, “A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends.” Even if there is an ounce of truth to what is said, is it your place to be saying it or judging, according to the verses above in Romans ~ no it is not!
Another thing to consider; Philippians 3:13, “Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” If they have taken whatever was in their past to God then tell me again why it is they have to pass your judgment and tests in order for them to move forward to serve God. Why do you think it is your duty or privilege to judge them?
We are called to build each other up and restore, we are not here to condemn! Galatians 6:1 “Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, you which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering yourself, lest you also be tempted.” There’s so much more to be gained by restoring others than condemning them. If we can focus on helping each other become all that we can be for God, God will be glorified and more will be accomplished for Him.
We need to remember verse 12 of Roman 14, “So then, each of us will give an account of himself to God.” If we focus on our own issues and we allow God to work in the lives of others more will be done for Him and we will have less to answer for one day when we stand before Him! Matthew 7:3, “And why do you behold the splinter that is in your brother’s eye, but you don’t consider the beam that is in your own eye?” If it is your spouse that has sinned against you, then you both need to be able to take it to God together if they are repentant. Unfortunately there are times when they have no desire to repent or to be restored and that takes it out of your hands and at that point the best thing to do is to draw near to God and allow Him to guide you and to heal your wounded heart. God sees and He cares. He will carry you through so allow Him to make you a better person instead of bitter through it all. Allow this time to draw you closer to God. Pray for your spouse and leave the rest to God.
I would like to encourage each of you to find ways to build others up this week. Help them to find their strengths and to be used by God. When someone comes to you to “share” what they were told about someone else, stop them before they can get started planting that seed if you know it’s none of your business. Push forward with one goal in mind and that is to further the cause of Christ by glorifying Him in all you do and by allowing Him to work in your life and the lives of others around you so you can all be all that God created you to be and so can they!
“If you judge people, you don’t have time to love them.” Mother Teresa